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I know dreams are boring to everyone but the dreamer but I find it interesting.
So I have moderately frequent dreams about being in highschool. Sometimes, as at the start of last night's, it's a flashback to when I was a teenager, and my friends from that time are there etc. But generally there's a point where I start to remember that I have already finished highschool and been to uni etc.
Sometimes I remember I have cfs as well, which is stressful, since highschool with cfs would be awful. Though it can offer an explanation for still being in highschool: I got cfs as a teenager and had to switch to part time, so I'm just working through things slowly. Which would only explain me being 19ish, not 40, and this version doesn't come up very often.
Over time I've developed a different, completely ridiculous default explanation: at some point I decided to redo highschool to really solidify my understanding of calculus and physics. My parents agreed to pay the school fees for my overpriced private school for Reasons and I just...pass as a teenager somehow. A lot of the time I seem to see myself as a twenty something, possibly even still doing my Phd.
The downside to this explanation is I suddenly feel awkward about hanging out with teenagers and lying to everyone (when in fact I was acting like a teen because I was one, dreamwise) and also weird about how...completely ridiculous this is as motivation and how there are so many better ways to practice maths.
The upside is that it really undercuts any "OH NO I HAVE A PHYSICS EXAM TODAY AND HAVEN'T STUDIED!!" nightmares because even if the dream before that was 100% "I am a regular teen" at this point the "I am an adult redoing highschool for kicks" worldbuilding is ingrained enough that it kicks in quickly and I remember I already got an A in highschool physics and failing it now won't be a big deal. There's also a version where I'm doing extra difficult advanced classes, so I go from "THIS IS ALL CONFUSING AND IMPOSSIBLE" to "well, I wanted a challenge and there's no harm to failing".
But last night was different! I started out as teen!me at my actual highschool with my friends from the time, then...somehow I was a (still teenaged) Australian exchange student at a LA based highschool. In 2020, apparently, since I suddenly remembered Covid partway through and took a step away from the person I was standing next to haha. Then there was a weird plot where I signed up for some program to erase unhelpful memories/personality traits. And then, still kind of woozy and confused, I bumped into one of my university friends, who looked about 30.
I recognised him and said hi, he recognised me too but went "Why are you in a highschool uniform??" and I very suddenly remembered that I'm an adult, and realised someone had brainwashed me into thinking I was a teenager. Just as I was trying to figure out who and why I woke up.
So instead of making the dream less scary, it made it more scary! Now I'm wondering if this worldbuilding will show up again. It's certainly interesting, but pretty disquieting.
So I have moderately frequent dreams about being in highschool. Sometimes, as at the start of last night's, it's a flashback to when I was a teenager, and my friends from that time are there etc. But generally there's a point where I start to remember that I have already finished highschool and been to uni etc.
Sometimes I remember I have cfs as well, which is stressful, since highschool with cfs would be awful. Though it can offer an explanation for still being in highschool: I got cfs as a teenager and had to switch to part time, so I'm just working through things slowly. Which would only explain me being 19ish, not 40, and this version doesn't come up very often.
Over time I've developed a different, completely ridiculous default explanation: at some point I decided to redo highschool to really solidify my understanding of calculus and physics. My parents agreed to pay the school fees for my overpriced private school for Reasons and I just...pass as a teenager somehow. A lot of the time I seem to see myself as a twenty something, possibly even still doing my Phd.
The downside to this explanation is I suddenly feel awkward about hanging out with teenagers and lying to everyone (when in fact I was acting like a teen because I was one, dreamwise) and also weird about how...completely ridiculous this is as motivation and how there are so many better ways to practice maths.
The upside is that it really undercuts any "OH NO I HAVE A PHYSICS EXAM TODAY AND HAVEN'T STUDIED!!" nightmares because even if the dream before that was 100% "I am a regular teen" at this point the "I am an adult redoing highschool for kicks" worldbuilding is ingrained enough that it kicks in quickly and I remember I already got an A in highschool physics and failing it now won't be a big deal. There's also a version where I'm doing extra difficult advanced classes, so I go from "THIS IS ALL CONFUSING AND IMPOSSIBLE" to "well, I wanted a challenge and there's no harm to failing".
But last night was different! I started out as teen!me at my actual highschool with my friends from the time, then...somehow I was a (still teenaged) Australian exchange student at a LA based highschool. In 2020, apparently, since I suddenly remembered Covid partway through and took a step away from the person I was standing next to haha. Then there was a weird plot where I signed up for some program to erase unhelpful memories/personality traits. And then, still kind of woozy and confused, I bumped into one of my university friends, who looked about 30.
I recognised him and said hi, he recognised me too but went "Why are you in a highschool uniform??" and I very suddenly remembered that I'm an adult, and realised someone had brainwashed me into thinking I was a teenager. Just as I was trying to figure out who and why I woke up.
So instead of making the dream less scary, it made it more scary! Now I'm wondering if this worldbuilding will show up again. It's certainly interesting, but pretty disquieting.
no subject
Date: 2020-06-19 06:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-06-20 06:05 am (UTC)Yes! And I love the way that, for example, you having a driver's license is a more memorable fact than that the driving test involves...driving.