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alias_sqbrWant to get it it into the world before Season 3 decisively josses it (or, more implausibly, confirms it, and makes me look brilliant) The first draft of this was written post season 1's cliffhanger but ended up working much better for season 2's.
Fandom: Voltron Legendary Defender
Rating: T for violence?
Pairings: Shiro/Allura(/Keith??), Hagar/Zarkon, weird implied Shiro/Hagar sort of
Content: Sort of mpreg-ish, trans issues, body horror, PTSD, death, unreality
The weird little bit I did end up writing
Shiro wakes to bright lights and the outline of someone leaning over him.
It's Allura. He's safe, he's in the castle. He smiles at her in relief and she smiles back. She puts her long fingered hand on his face, her skin is cool and smooth. She leans down and kisses him, her lips gentle and soft. It feels familiar, safe, yet exhilerating, like they're doing it for the first time.
But they have kissed before. They must have.
Shiro wants to reach up his hand to touch her face, to run his fingers through the hair that falls like clouds around him. He tries to reach for her, but something's wrong. His arm won't move. He can't move at all. From the corner of his eye he can see his shoulder and…
And nothing. The arm is gone.
All there is is tubes and wires in a mass of flesh where his shoulder used to be. She runs her hands aquisitively down his chest, her nails sharp like knives. Her hands stop on his belly, which feels tight and swollen.
"Can you feel the magic within yourself?" she asks, happily. Proudly.
His belly squirms, round and swollen with…something. The wires in his arm twist and push inside the hole in his shoulder, tightening around the bone, piercing his flesh. He would cry for the pain but can't even open his mouth to gasp.
"I'll make you even better than you were before," she says, in a low whisper, as her knives cut into him. "Better than the others. And only we will know the truth, eh?" She laughs, hoarse and bitter.
His muscles twitch and grow, he feels his back bend and stretch. Is this better? Is this what he wants? This doesn't feel right. And it hurts it hurts it…
Shiro wakes up to his alarm and the sound of birdsong. Time to get dressed! He slips out of his pajama top and starts buttoning up his shirt. but it's too tight acros the chest. His tie is too short, too, and his shoes too small. I'm too big for this now he thinks. But he can't be late for school.
Keith and the others are waiting. "What are you wearing?" ask Pidge. "You can't fight in that." Shiro's heart sinks as he realises he's wearing the wrong uniform. Noone at the Garrison wears skirts.
"Doesn't matter what he's wearing," says Lance. "I'm going to beat all of you!"
"Not if I beat you first!" says Hunk. He strikes forward with his shield and Lance laughs and ducks to the side. He shoots, and Hunk falls. Hunk sobs, a wail of pain and loss. Lance shoots him again and Hunk screams and screams and then goes silent. Lance laughs. The familiar smell of burned flesh fills the air.
Shiro's fist clenches and goes warm.
Pidge's eyes flash and her bayard streaks across towards Shiro. He crushes it in his hand and Keith strikes her down. She is a small form on the ground, so small… Lance shoots at Keith but fails to connect, and Keith goes for the kill. The crowd shouts as the two struggle for control. A cry of triumph fills the air as Lance falls, blood soaking into the ground at Shiro's feet.
"Good", says his father, his wide ears pointing upwards with satisfaction. Keith smiles, distracted by this rare praise. It's the perfect time for Shiro to strike. To win.
No. This is a dream. He needs to wake up. He needs to…
Shiro wakes up in the dark. His heart races. But nothing happens. It's just him, alone, in the dark. You're safe, you're in the castle, you're safe, you're in your bed, you're safe, you're home.
But it's not the castle. The light is the wrong colour, the sounds strange. Whatever he's lying on, it's not his bed, it's too hard, and he hurts. Is this another dream? It doesn't feel like he's dreaming.
He struggles to move, to wake, but something drags him back under.
Shiro wakes in his familiar cell in the garrison. Runs his hands over the wall, feels the scratches marking days. 10, 20…
Shiro wakes to the sight of the mother of his child, eyes bright with happiness as she holds their son…
Shiro wakes on the eve of battle, in an empty bed, to a crowded prison…
Shiro wakes.
It's good that the black lion responds to Allura. If it didn't, they'd all be screwed. Shiro isn't dead, he can't be, but neither is the Galra empire. Not entirely, not while there's Galra soldiers with guns and ships and the desire to control the galaxy. And while they wait for Shiro to come back from…where ever he's gone to, they need Voltron to defend themselves.
But Keith hates it. He hates seeing Allura in the black uniform, hates seeing following her commands, hates feeling like his hatred is the reason they can't bond well enough to form Voltron. It's not that she's doing anything wrong. But she isn't Shiro, and he can't make himself not resent her for it.
Summary
At the end of season 2 Shiro became quintessence and was absorbed by Zarkon. Their consciousnesses are all mixed up in Zarkon's head. This manifests as Shiro having freaky "dreams" which combine his memories, Zarkon's memories, and the material reality of being in Zarkon's comatose body being tended by Hagar. Shiro is slow to realise that this bizarre reality is not just a dream.
Switch to the Paladins, wondering where Shiro is. Allura and Keith are especially angsty but everyone is both sad and determined to keep going.
Eventually Shiro wakes up in Zakron's body, with Zarkon's consciousness less around but still affecting him. On the plus side the memories help his pretence. He pretends to be Zarkon and escapes back to the paladins. They are obviously very dubious about his story but eventually believe him, somehow he gets his body back (or a new one that looks basically the same. Healing pods help maybe?). Not sure what happens to Zarkon. Allura feels a little weird that Shiro, like Keith, is part Galra now. Shiro and Allura (and maybe...also Keith??) have conflicted UST followed by smooches, everyone lives happily ever after except maybe Zarkon, THE END.
Backstory/worldbuilding
Did I mention I came up with this plot just as I was figuring out my gender...
Shiro is a trans man and has mixed feelings about the body mods he got as a Galra prisoner making him bigger and stronger, especially since he was pretty happy with his body before that thanks to futuristic level medical science.
The Galra are a single gendered species, they used to have two genders and so have a concept of maleness and pretty much all identify as male (I guess SOME might identify as female or nb but it would be like...those are alien identities you weirdo furry) As explored in my (much more cheerful!) fic Interspecies Gender Theory Hour the Alteans are single sex but not single gender: all are born 'female' but often choose other genders around the time they reach physical maturity and gain the ability to shapeshift (and also have children). They are actually an offshoot of the Galrans who gained shapeshifting abilities. Unfortunately this all comes across a bit gender essentialist 'women are inherently nicer than men' but it's hard to not go that way when the Evil Aliens are literally all male, I guess if I ever actually wrote the fic I'd try and have plenty of depictions of decent Galrans.
Anyway. Alteans and Galra are capable of having children together, and Zarkon had a son, Lotor, with Hagar. This leads to Shiro having some very disturbing "being pregnant" nightmares. Yes I started with the nightmares and worked backwards shh.
I actually wrote the first dream way back after season 1 and am amused at HOW MUCH MORE SENSE it makes now that Hagar has been revealed as an Altean and there's a good reason beyond general PTSD angst for Shiro to dream himself on a table full of tubes being operated on by Hagar. Good job past self :D It was also originally just Shiro/Allura with maybe some background Keith/Lance but Season 2 got me more on the Keith/Shiro and Keith/Allura trains, plus it would add to the angst. I feel a bit weird about the age gaps but hey I'm not actually writing it so eh.
SO YES. I ran out of momentum for writing the fic, and it would be hard to avoid unfortunate implications if I ever did. But I wanted to get what I have out into the world before Season 3 comes out.
If you are reading this and feel inspired by any of it knock yourself out. Give me some credit if you use a big chunk of them, but don't feel obliged to stick to my plan, such as it is.
Fandom: Voltron Legendary Defender
Rating: T for violence?
Pairings: Shiro/Allura(/Keith??), Hagar/Zarkon, weird implied Shiro/Hagar sort of
Content: Sort of mpreg-ish, trans issues, body horror, PTSD, death, unreality
The weird little bit I did end up writing
Shiro wakes to bright lights and the outline of someone leaning over him.
It's Allura. He's safe, he's in the castle. He smiles at her in relief and she smiles back. She puts her long fingered hand on his face, her skin is cool and smooth. She leans down and kisses him, her lips gentle and soft. It feels familiar, safe, yet exhilerating, like they're doing it for the first time.
But they have kissed before. They must have.
Shiro wants to reach up his hand to touch her face, to run his fingers through the hair that falls like clouds around him. He tries to reach for her, but something's wrong. His arm won't move. He can't move at all. From the corner of his eye he can see his shoulder and…
And nothing. The arm is gone.
All there is is tubes and wires in a mass of flesh where his shoulder used to be. She runs her hands aquisitively down his chest, her nails sharp like knives. Her hands stop on his belly, which feels tight and swollen.
"Can you feel the magic within yourself?" she asks, happily. Proudly.
His belly squirms, round and swollen with…something. The wires in his arm twist and push inside the hole in his shoulder, tightening around the bone, piercing his flesh. He would cry for the pain but can't even open his mouth to gasp.
"I'll make you even better than you were before," she says, in a low whisper, as her knives cut into him. "Better than the others. And only we will know the truth, eh?" She laughs, hoarse and bitter.
His muscles twitch and grow, he feels his back bend and stretch. Is this better? Is this what he wants? This doesn't feel right. And it hurts it hurts it…
Shiro wakes up to his alarm and the sound of birdsong. Time to get dressed! He slips out of his pajama top and starts buttoning up his shirt. but it's too tight acros the chest. His tie is too short, too, and his shoes too small. I'm too big for this now he thinks. But he can't be late for school.
Keith and the others are waiting. "What are you wearing?" ask Pidge. "You can't fight in that." Shiro's heart sinks as he realises he's wearing the wrong uniform. Noone at the Garrison wears skirts.
"Doesn't matter what he's wearing," says Lance. "I'm going to beat all of you!"
"Not if I beat you first!" says Hunk. He strikes forward with his shield and Lance laughs and ducks to the side. He shoots, and Hunk falls. Hunk sobs, a wail of pain and loss. Lance shoots him again and Hunk screams and screams and then goes silent. Lance laughs. The familiar smell of burned flesh fills the air.
Shiro's fist clenches and goes warm.
Pidge's eyes flash and her bayard streaks across towards Shiro. He crushes it in his hand and Keith strikes her down. She is a small form on the ground, so small… Lance shoots at Keith but fails to connect, and Keith goes for the kill. The crowd shouts as the two struggle for control. A cry of triumph fills the air as Lance falls, blood soaking into the ground at Shiro's feet.
"Good", says his father, his wide ears pointing upwards with satisfaction. Keith smiles, distracted by this rare praise. It's the perfect time for Shiro to strike. To win.
No. This is a dream. He needs to wake up. He needs to…
Shiro wakes up in the dark. His heart races. But nothing happens. It's just him, alone, in the dark. You're safe, you're in the castle, you're safe, you're in your bed, you're safe, you're home.
But it's not the castle. The light is the wrong colour, the sounds strange. Whatever he's lying on, it's not his bed, it's too hard, and he hurts. Is this another dream? It doesn't feel like he's dreaming.
He struggles to move, to wake, but something drags him back under.
Shiro wakes in his familiar cell in the garrison. Runs his hands over the wall, feels the scratches marking days. 10, 20…
Shiro wakes to the sight of the mother of his child, eyes bright with happiness as she holds their son…
Shiro wakes on the eve of battle, in an empty bed, to a crowded prison…
Shiro wakes.
It's good that the black lion responds to Allura. If it didn't, they'd all be screwed. Shiro isn't dead, he can't be, but neither is the Galra empire. Not entirely, not while there's Galra soldiers with guns and ships and the desire to control the galaxy. And while they wait for Shiro to come back from…where ever he's gone to, they need Voltron to defend themselves.
But Keith hates it. He hates seeing Allura in the black uniform, hates seeing following her commands, hates feeling like his hatred is the reason they can't bond well enough to form Voltron. It's not that she's doing anything wrong. But she isn't Shiro, and he can't make himself not resent her for it.
Summary
At the end of season 2 Shiro became quintessence and was absorbed by Zarkon. Their consciousnesses are all mixed up in Zarkon's head. This manifests as Shiro having freaky "dreams" which combine his memories, Zarkon's memories, and the material reality of being in Zarkon's comatose body being tended by Hagar. Shiro is slow to realise that this bizarre reality is not just a dream.
Switch to the Paladins, wondering where Shiro is. Allura and Keith are especially angsty but everyone is both sad and determined to keep going.
Eventually Shiro wakes up in Zakron's body, with Zarkon's consciousness less around but still affecting him. On the plus side the memories help his pretence. He pretends to be Zarkon and escapes back to the paladins. They are obviously very dubious about his story but eventually believe him, somehow he gets his body back (or a new one that looks basically the same. Healing pods help maybe?). Not sure what happens to Zarkon. Allura feels a little weird that Shiro, like Keith, is part Galra now. Shiro and Allura (and maybe...also Keith??) have conflicted UST followed by smooches, everyone lives happily ever after except maybe Zarkon, THE END.
Backstory/worldbuilding
Did I mention I came up with this plot just as I was figuring out my gender...
Shiro is a trans man and has mixed feelings about the body mods he got as a Galra prisoner making him bigger and stronger, especially since he was pretty happy with his body before that thanks to futuristic level medical science.
The Galra are a single gendered species, they used to have two genders and so have a concept of maleness and pretty much all identify as male (I guess SOME might identify as female or nb but it would be like...those are alien identities you weirdo furry) As explored in my (much more cheerful!) fic Interspecies Gender Theory Hour the Alteans are single sex but not single gender: all are born 'female' but often choose other genders around the time they reach physical maturity and gain the ability to shapeshift (and also have children). They are actually an offshoot of the Galrans who gained shapeshifting abilities. Unfortunately this all comes across a bit gender essentialist 'women are inherently nicer than men' but it's hard to not go that way when the Evil Aliens are literally all male, I guess if I ever actually wrote the fic I'd try and have plenty of depictions of decent Galrans.
Anyway. Alteans and Galra are capable of having children together, and Zarkon had a son, Lotor, with Hagar. This leads to Shiro having some very disturbing "being pregnant" nightmares. Yes I started with the nightmares and worked backwards shh.
I actually wrote the first dream way back after season 1 and am amused at HOW MUCH MORE SENSE it makes now that Hagar has been revealed as an Altean and there's a good reason beyond general PTSD angst for Shiro to dream himself on a table full of tubes being operated on by Hagar. Good job past self :D It was also originally just Shiro/Allura with maybe some background Keith/Lance but Season 2 got me more on the Keith/Shiro and Keith/Allura trains, plus it would add to the angst. I feel a bit weird about the age gaps but hey I'm not actually writing it so eh.
SO YES. I ran out of momentum for writing the fic, and it would be hard to avoid unfortunate implications if I ever did. But I wanted to get what I have out into the world before Season 3 comes out.
If you are reading this and feel inspired by any of it knock yourself out. Give me some credit if you use a big chunk of them, but don't feel obliged to stick to my plan, such as it is.
