alias_sqbr (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
alias_sqbr) wrote2018-12-13 12:17 pm
alias_sqbr) wrote2018-12-13 12:17 pm
Nameless: Secret (final)
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The final secret end.
No warnings exactly but it made me cry.
So!
I start a new game. I stare at "Forget the name" for a while and then click it. A box comes up saying "You will forget the name of your first doll and lose all your save data. Continue?"
I lose my nerve and double check google. Reassured, I go back and click "yes" and am taken back to the title screen.
I start another new game.
"What is the name of the first doll?"
I nearly reply sANG then fix my capslock and type "Sang", as I chose at the very start. The text changes slightly.
"What is the name of the abandoned doll?"
Sang
"What is the name of the doll who is broken, who has forgotten it's owner, who is waiting for you...."
Eventually I typed it enough times and the game began.
The narrator talks about sitting on a shelf unable to move, seeing the same view every day, waiting to be chosen. It's Nameless, describing being bought by Eri's grandpa.
"Everyone at the store thought it was our fate to be picked up by a stranger and bought by them."
Nameless meets Eri, and finds her crying unpleasant. But then she holds him up to her face and smiles and he realises he was born to make humans happy. She names him Sang.
Have I mentioned the dolls=women in a sexist society metaphor before?
I need to go to sleep, so! Let's check a few things.
The diary is entirely blank. The saves have indeed been deleted. This save is labelled "Secret", just like the last route. BUT all the chapters, CGs, diaries, and interviews are still there :D
Sang finds Eri's needy immaturity a bit annoying. He sees her as lonely and stupid, and watches her pain over her parent's absence.
He admires grandpa's patience sewing him back together after "the first creature other than the little girl harassed me", but feels grandpa puts a heavy burden on him in looking after Eri.
Eri: This diary will be for Sang and me, just the two of us.
Sang doesn't like when she focusses so hard on something that isn't him. And he thinks: Why don't my arms move? Why doesn't my heart beat? Why am I just a doll? Some day I'll be abandoned when she turns her attention to her diary or other dolls. If she forgets me, will the things she's written about me disappear too?
Dark things start to fill him up. He knows she's really writing the diary to show her parents how much she misses them, and about her life, and that one day, his name will stop appearing.
"It was set from the start. I'm just a toy, to be sold to someone, used by someone, thrown out by someone."
Mom: I'll look at the diary later. I'll proofread it for grammar mistakes.
Her parents walk away and Eri hugs Sang tightly, letting him soak up her quiet tears. And Sang is glad, because it means she won't abandon him for a little while longer. When her parents are gone, she promises to be with him forever.
"Even though I know it's a lie, why do those words make me feel so good?"
Sang is silent because he's the narrator, I think it would have been interesting if they'd voiced Eri for this part but they didn't, and since I got sick of the music it's all very quiet.
"Stupid little girl, why ask me to stay when I am incapable of leaving. But I want to believe her...I will trust her. She won't throw me away, she won't forget me, and that diary is just for the two of us."
We are in the room of forgotten toys and hear Sang's voice for the first time this path, but it's an almost inaudible whisper.
Sang: I...believed it.
It's the past again, the scene where Eri's dad brings her a replacement for Nameless. His paternalistic tone when he talks to Eri sounds almost exactly like Tei's.
He can't help but compare himself: the new doll is bigger, fluffier, cleaner, and has a nicer ribbon.
Eri comes hime from kindergarten blushing over a boy she thinks has a crush on her. She has to wear a skirt to the dance and grandpa says he'll help her buy one she likes. She doesn't take Sang and he feels anger for the first time. He starts to hate "the girl".
Eri hasn't touched Sang in a week and is talking about the hot new toy all the other kids have. "Hurry," he thinks. "Hurry and pick me up."
But he just sits in the same spot, with the same view every day and hopes for her attention. He is reminded of the indifference he felt in the store: is he returning to that state? But she promised!
The next time he's touched it's Eri's grandpa dusting him off. Sang wonders if he's about to be thrown away, but he is placed on a bookshelf with the fairytales Eri doesn't read any more.
Grandpa: Thank you for helping her get used to this place.
Sang: I see. He used me from the start, so that she would like him more. One thank you can't make up for all the despair I feel. They are exploiters, and I will never forget it.
Time passes: Months? Years? But Sang never forgets his name. And one day the "new" doll joins him on the shelf. Sometimes Eri passes by, but it's never Sang she's looking for. He laughs to himself darkly that being special was an illusion.
Eri gets older. And so does grandpa. He has started to cough more and more. And then one day, he collapses, coughs a few more times, and is dead.
Eri finds the body, and screams. That night she lies on the library floor, and then looks at the book shelf. She notices the shelf with her old books and toys and cries.
And then her eyes meet Sang's and she reaches towards him. Has she remembered her promise? Sang shouts to her in his mind.
But the door opens: it's Eri's mother. Eri runs to her, crying.
Mom: You can't stay here. I'll clean up this place. You'll only get more upset if you see traces of him.
The room fills with silence again and Sang wishes he could cry.
The next day the door opens again and he has a moment of hope, but it's Eri's mum coming to clean up "everything except the antique books". All the traces of Eri and her grandpa are put into a huge box: crayons and pictures and the other dolls. And Sang.
"There was no exception. There was no special immunity for me."
But he still remembers that Eri was going to reach for him.
He waited in the room of forgotten toys, and his waiting turned into resentment. "She shouldn't have promised. He shouldn't have told me that waiting was enough." He hates himself for waiting for her despite hating her. Because he still remembers her smile.
He meets the wizard and his hopeful game begins...and ends.
Sang: The villain was me and the hero was them. I'm just a scarred teddy bear who can't do anything but wait. All I have is that I was the first.
He waits and wonders if his only choice is to give her up.
Sang...it's the name of the abandoned doll. The doll who abandoned it's owner.
Sang: Stop calling me. I'm going to abandon you, so you forget me too. I don't want to hope any more.
We see Eri in her kitchen in the present, as at the end of the previous route.
Eri: Sang. Yes, that's definitely your name...why am I crying? I guess I must have missed you a lot. I feel like I can meet grandpa again after finding you. I'll get you a new ribbon as an apology for forgetting you for so long. People say that when a doll gets a new ribbon, it's reborn. Then I'll introduce you to my family.
Feathers fly past.
The door to the room of forgotten toys unlocks, and Sang reaches for the handle.
Sang: She called my name. He told me waiting was enough...
Eri gasps as Sang walks through the door.
Eri: Oh! We've met before! I forgot you since that day...but I'm so happy I found you! Have you been staying in that dark room?
Her smile reminds him of when she was young. She hugs him and he cries and whispers that she can't forget his name again.
The closing credits play, a black and white animation of bear!Sang walking empty streets against a starry sky, then looking at the merry-go-round and Eri's dairy, and then a vision of the open door to the room of forgotten toys filling with light.
THE END
And that's it, the game is done. I did not expect a dating sim to give me so many feelings about a teddy bear. Note: I didn't skip the merry-go-round/amusement park, it never comes up directly in this route.
I have some thoughts but they're still bubbling in my head. Overall I really liked it a lot, I love stories about people who feel like objects and learn to define themselves. Though for a dating sim it's a bit lacking in romantic resolution, I'm pondering ot6 fic(*) just to resolve in my own head how they all work things out. But everyone feels loved and is no longer alone.
And Crobidoll are definitely the villains.
Not sure if I'll buy any of the audio drama DLCs, especially since they're AUs (written by Crobidoll??) and you get the translation separate as a PDF. The DLC clips might be useful for any of you who are curious to hear everyone's voices, though be warned that Sexy Yujin has some consent issues. EDIT: And Yeonho is like half an octave deeper and being a sexy doctor??? Ok on further investigation he and the listener are officemates in a relationship but she has a cold.
EDIT: Apparently the only one that actually follows on from game canon is Black and White Christmas, so I looked up the translation. Aww ;_;
(*)Or maybe ot5. I kind of have to ship Tei/Eri since she does, but Sang is maybe more than I can manage. Apologies to the friend reading these recaps who ships Sang/Eri.
The final secret end.
No warnings exactly but it made me cry.
So!
I start a new game. I stare at "Forget the name" for a while and then click it. A box comes up saying "You will forget the name of your first doll and lose all your save data. Continue?"
I lose my nerve and double check google. Reassured, I go back and click "yes" and am taken back to the title screen.
I start another new game.
"What is the name of the first doll?"
I nearly reply sANG then fix my capslock and type "Sang", as I chose at the very start. The text changes slightly.
"What is the name of the abandoned doll?"
Sang
"What is the name of the doll who is broken, who has forgotten it's owner, who is waiting for you...."
Eventually I typed it enough times and the game began.
The narrator talks about sitting on a shelf unable to move, seeing the same view every day, waiting to be chosen. It's Nameless, describing being bought by Eri's grandpa.
"Everyone at the store thought it was our fate to be picked up by a stranger and bought by them."
Nameless meets Eri, and finds her crying unpleasant. But then she holds him up to her face and smiles and he realises he was born to make humans happy. She names him Sang.
Have I mentioned the dolls=women in a sexist society metaphor before?
I need to go to sleep, so! Let's check a few things.
The diary is entirely blank. The saves have indeed been deleted. This save is labelled "Secret", just like the last route. BUT all the chapters, CGs, diaries, and interviews are still there :D
Sang finds Eri's needy immaturity a bit annoying. He sees her as lonely and stupid, and watches her pain over her parent's absence.
He admires grandpa's patience sewing him back together after "the first creature other than the little girl harassed me", but feels grandpa puts a heavy burden on him in looking after Eri.
Eri: This diary will be for Sang and me, just the two of us.
Sang doesn't like when she focusses so hard on something that isn't him. And he thinks: Why don't my arms move? Why doesn't my heart beat? Why am I just a doll? Some day I'll be abandoned when she turns her attention to her diary or other dolls. If she forgets me, will the things she's written about me disappear too?
Dark things start to fill him up. He knows she's really writing the diary to show her parents how much she misses them, and about her life, and that one day, his name will stop appearing.
"It was set from the start. I'm just a toy, to be sold to someone, used by someone, thrown out by someone."
Mom: I'll look at the diary later. I'll proofread it for grammar mistakes.
Her parents walk away and Eri hugs Sang tightly, letting him soak up her quiet tears. And Sang is glad, because it means she won't abandon him for a little while longer. When her parents are gone, she promises to be with him forever.
"Even though I know it's a lie, why do those words make me feel so good?"
Sang is silent because he's the narrator, I think it would have been interesting if they'd voiced Eri for this part but they didn't, and since I got sick of the music it's all very quiet.
"Stupid little girl, why ask me to stay when I am incapable of leaving. But I want to believe her...I will trust her. She won't throw me away, she won't forget me, and that diary is just for the two of us."
We are in the room of forgotten toys and hear Sang's voice for the first time this path, but it's an almost inaudible whisper.
Sang: I...believed it.
It's the past again, the scene where Eri's dad brings her a replacement for Nameless. His paternalistic tone when he talks to Eri sounds almost exactly like Tei's.
He can't help but compare himself: the new doll is bigger, fluffier, cleaner, and has a nicer ribbon.
Eri comes hime from kindergarten blushing over a boy she thinks has a crush on her. She has to wear a skirt to the dance and grandpa says he'll help her buy one she likes. She doesn't take Sang and he feels anger for the first time. He starts to hate "the girl".
Eri hasn't touched Sang in a week and is talking about the hot new toy all the other kids have. "Hurry," he thinks. "Hurry and pick me up."
But he just sits in the same spot, with the same view every day and hopes for her attention. He is reminded of the indifference he felt in the store: is he returning to that state? But she promised!
The next time he's touched it's Eri's grandpa dusting him off. Sang wonders if he's about to be thrown away, but he is placed on a bookshelf with the fairytales Eri doesn't read any more.
Grandpa: Thank you for helping her get used to this place.
Sang: I see. He used me from the start, so that she would like him more. One thank you can't make up for all the despair I feel. They are exploiters, and I will never forget it.
Time passes: Months? Years? But Sang never forgets his name. And one day the "new" doll joins him on the shelf. Sometimes Eri passes by, but it's never Sang she's looking for. He laughs to himself darkly that being special was an illusion.
Eri gets older. And so does grandpa. He has started to cough more and more. And then one day, he collapses, coughs a few more times, and is dead.
Eri finds the body, and screams. That night she lies on the library floor, and then looks at the book shelf. She notices the shelf with her old books and toys and cries.
And then her eyes meet Sang's and she reaches towards him. Has she remembered her promise? Sang shouts to her in his mind.
But the door opens: it's Eri's mother. Eri runs to her, crying.
Mom: You can't stay here. I'll clean up this place. You'll only get more upset if you see traces of him.
The room fills with silence again and Sang wishes he could cry.
The next day the door opens again and he has a moment of hope, but it's Eri's mum coming to clean up "everything except the antique books". All the traces of Eri and her grandpa are put into a huge box: crayons and pictures and the other dolls. And Sang.
"There was no exception. There was no special immunity for me."
But he still remembers that Eri was going to reach for him.
He waited in the room of forgotten toys, and his waiting turned into resentment. "She shouldn't have promised. He shouldn't have told me that waiting was enough." He hates himself for waiting for her despite hating her. Because he still remembers her smile.
He meets the wizard and his hopeful game begins...and ends.
Sang: The villain was me and the hero was them. I'm just a scarred teddy bear who can't do anything but wait. All I have is that I was the first.
He waits and wonders if his only choice is to give her up.
Sang...it's the name of the abandoned doll. The doll who abandoned it's owner.
Sang: Stop calling me. I'm going to abandon you, so you forget me too. I don't want to hope any more.
We see Eri in her kitchen in the present, as at the end of the previous route.
Eri: Sang. Yes, that's definitely your name...why am I crying? I guess I must have missed you a lot. I feel like I can meet grandpa again after finding you. I'll get you a new ribbon as an apology for forgetting you for so long. People say that when a doll gets a new ribbon, it's reborn. Then I'll introduce you to my family.
Feathers fly past.
The door to the room of forgotten toys unlocks, and Sang reaches for the handle.
Sang: She called my name. He told me waiting was enough...
Eri gasps as Sang walks through the door.
Eri: Oh! We've met before! I forgot you since that day...but I'm so happy I found you! Have you been staying in that dark room?
Her smile reminds him of when she was young. She hugs him and he cries and whispers that she can't forget his name again.
The closing credits play, a black and white animation of bear!Sang walking empty streets against a starry sky, then looking at the merry-go-round and Eri's dairy, and then a vision of the open door to the room of forgotten toys filling with light.
THE END
And that's it, the game is done. I did not expect a dating sim to give me so many feelings about a teddy bear. Note: I didn't skip the merry-go-round/amusement park, it never comes up directly in this route.
I have some thoughts but they're still bubbling in my head. Overall I really liked it a lot, I love stories about people who feel like objects and learn to define themselves. Though for a dating sim it's a bit lacking in romantic resolution, I'm pondering ot6 fic(*) just to resolve in my own head how they all work things out. But everyone feels loved and is no longer alone.
And Crobidoll are definitely the villains.
Not sure if I'll buy any of the audio drama DLCs, especially since they're AUs (written by Crobidoll??) and you get the translation separate as a PDF. The DLC clips might be useful for any of you who are curious to hear everyone's voices, though be warned that Sexy Yujin has some consent issues. EDIT: And Yeonho is like half an octave deeper and being a sexy doctor??? Ok on further investigation he and the listener are officemates in a relationship but she has a cold.
EDIT: Apparently the only one that actually follows on from game canon is Black and White Christmas, so I looked up the translation. Aww ;_;
(*)Or maybe ot5. I kind of have to ship Tei/Eri since she does, but Sang is maybe more than I can manage. Apologies to the friend reading these recaps who ships Sang/Eri.